The other night, my husband and I had a conversation about intimacy.
Sarah’s post left me thinking about the felt presence of God. I realize that I have allowed my relationship with God to slip to a functional, practical level. I drifted away from intimacy.
I am not sure how to describe what I am saying without using the words felt and touched. I will try to avoid getting too creepy or sappy in my descriptions, and hopefully I won’t leave you thinking we’re freaks. ;)
So I asked my husband, “Do you still feel God?”
“Yeah, all the time.”
“No, I don’t mean the general awareness of Him, I mean the touch-your-soul sort of feeling.”
“Oh, the electric fence.”
“Yeah, the electric fence.”
“Not so much lately.”
“So do you go looking for the feeling, or do you just wait for the moment?”
When distance develops, who initiates?
I don’t want to settle into a relationship that lacks connecting with God at an intimate level where my heart is touched by His presence.
In the past, we had wonderful, sometimes overwhelming, experiences of the felt presence of God. It only takes a time or two of that to become like an addict, dependent on feeling Him, yearning for the next encounter.
We know that there are spiritual seasons and that His presence is a reality in spite of our feelings at the moment. Even in the midst of a dry or desert season though, it is important to find a way to connect.
But how? We go back to the things that we know, the places where we met before, where we felt His presence. We make time, we wait expectantly, we draw near, and we respond.
I notice this among the people from our former church who are displaced charismatics. No matter what they pursue, everyone is ultimately looking for that place of connection and intimacy. And I think we are looking for situations that inspire and encourage us in making and keeping that intimate connection.
Some of our friends are chasing conferences, others are spending time soaking (listening to worship music together), others are trying to “get plugged in” at a church, others hope the answer is in creating a worship experience or a new way of gathering.
The bottom line is that I think we all want intimacy with God and out of that a sense of intimacy with one another.
What are your thoughts about the felt presence of God?
(I’m going to be away for a few days. Feel free to comment, but I won’t be responding until the weekend.)