The Secret

Have you heard?

It is all the buzz, the #1 seller on Amazon and featured twice on Oprah!

So, what is The Secret? It is the Law of Attraction.

In the film, Bob Proctor says, “Everything that’s coming into your life you are attracting into your life. And it’s attracted to you by virtue of the images you’re holding in your mind.”

So what is a Christian to think of this?

In the Christian sphere, we hear similar messages in the prosperity gospel, name it and claim it, your best life now, and the power of positive thinking.

Are there useful principles and truths that are applicable to a believer’s growth and maturity? Sure there are. Learning to take thoughts captive, to have our minds renewed according to the truth of God’s Word, to overcome doubt and fear, these are all valuable concepts to understand.

Will this be a tool for bringing truth to spiritual seekers?

Is The Secret really Truth?

Is Spam really meat?

Is Velveeta really cheese?

I don’t think that we can present a message of self-will and expect that people will find the truth of Jesus and the gospel in the midst of that.

The promises of The Secret seem antithetical to taking up one’s cross. Based on its enormous popularity, we can see that people want answers. Or maybe they just want easy answers.

People are hungry.
Can we give them something better than Velveeta and Spam?

Final Thoughts on Exiles

“Christianity in a ghetto is not Christianity at all. If we retreat into our own compounds and eat our own meat, sharing our tables only with other Christians, our faith becomes nonmissional.” (Michael Frost, Exiles)

Michael has some good thoughts about sharing our table as an expression of missional socializing and hospitality.

I also appreciated what he had to say about dualism and the enormous gap between vocational ministry and everyone else. As a lay person, I still see very little change in the dualistic mentalities regarding vocation, calling, and ministry.

The section of the book on dangerous criticim was difficult for me. While I agree with the overall principles presented, I had trouble with the attitude that this was the christian position to take on specific issues. In reading it, I felt the same agenda-pushing as I have experienced from the right-wing evangelical camp.

I felt the section on corporations was extremely biased, exaggerated, and unfair. While there may be validity in some of his claims, I could not hear them through the glaring demonization of capitalism.

I share his convictions about many of the other issues, however, I do not necessarily share his interpretation or application. This entire section would have been more effective if the basic principles had been presented and the rest of it framed as personal opinion and example, rather than implied as the stance that must be taken by every christian.

Some good thoughts from this section:
We must be good stewards of the environment, caring for creation.
We must be globally aware of oppression and suffering.

In the section about Dangerous Songs, Michael emphasizes the importance of service as an act of worship. I also recently read Permission Granted which emphasizes the importance of intimate worship. We must have both. Service that is not sustained by intimate fellowship with the Lord will lack life and power. Worship that does not lead to service is unbiblical.

In the end, Michael reminds us that though we are exiles in this world, our home is in our hearts, in our reconciled relationship with the Father.

This book deeply impacted my thoughts on church, missional living, and community. I appreciate the brilliant insights and perspective interwoven throughout the book. It will be foundational for me as I continue to learn the realities of creating a missional life in my little corner of the world.

When is a Church a Missional Community?

Everyone knows that the missional purpose of the church is to reach the lost, right? The great commission. So why isn’t that what we are all about as churches? No matter how much we say that is our mission, the truth of what we are is in what we do.

To be honest, I don’t think the focus has been on our mission, but rather on our meetings, on how we are together.

Are we pomo, emerging, simple, seeker, mega, traditional, or fundie?

How are we going to worship? Hymns, contemporary, alt, stations, dance, art, loud, intimate, with instruments, or not?

How are we going to baptize? Sprinkle or dunk, hot tub or creek?

What about communion? Wine or juice, loaf or cracker, one cup or many?

We especially identify ourselves by our theology, teaching, and preaching. We meet in this particular building together because we hold this particular doctrine that our brothers in the building next door don’t agree with.

When we promote ourselves in the community as a church, these are the issues that people talk about. When someone is deciding on what church to join, they look at what kind of programs a church offers and their style of gathering.

While we may have programs for mission, it is not who we are. We are all about these other things.

If we were gathered for a missional purpose we would be known for that.

The 1st Church on the Corner might be known for reaching into the drug community.

While the 2nd Church on the Other Corner would be known for their ministry to the homeless.

And the 3rd Church Next Door might be all about their service to at-risk youth.

In church shopping, people would join themselves to a particular missional cause rather than to a worship gathering style.

That is not who we have been. Service to others has always been an add-on program after we have served ourselves first. In spite of our megabudgets, we have bake sales for the latest mission project. We send the youth on most of the outreach programs.

Look at our books and conferences. Let’s just keep tweaking the gathering, the structure, the members, eventually maybe we will get it right and produce some fruit.

Look at how we spend our resources, our time and money. It is telling of our real mission and purpose. We cannot truthfully look at the church we have built over hundreds of years and honestly say that our reason for existence is mission and service to others.

“Attending a respectable middle-class church in a respectable middle-class neighborhood isn’t a liminal experience.” (Michael Frost, Exiles)

Even if we do something less respectable, in a home or a pub or a coffee house, we will not be a missional community if our organizing purpose isn’t mission. Anything less and we will just be another group of like-minded people in a safe religious club, even if we happen to be a hip, cool club.

We have had a chronic case of cart before the horse, and it seems nearly impossible to turn the two around. However for those who are launching into missional expressions, perhaps we can learn from this. If we are not gathered around our missional purpose, none of the rest matters.

Missional community emerges from missional purpose first. We gather with those who share our heart and passion for this cause. We function together in the service of this cause. Our service together is what produces liminality which then creates the communitas we share as a group.

Therefore, the identifying question of who we are as a church should point directly to the missional purpose that we serve. Only then will we create a missional community.

Dangerous Memories

The message of this portion of the book is that we remember who we are as the people of God. While I originally thought from the title that Exiles referred to people outside of church, Michael uses this term to describe our status as citizens within, but not part of, the host empire of this world. As Robbymac said in the previous comments, “his use of “exiles” to sum up “in the world but not of the world” is brilliant.”

Michael acknowledges that many Exiles not only find themselves out of step with the world, but also with religious institutions. My own conclusion would be that we find ourselves out of step with religious institutions because they have adopted the ways of the host empire. A quote from the book:

“We must not be mesmerized by life here in Babylon. Nor must we become content with the values of Babylon or the symbols of temporal earthly might.”

Within the dangerous memories, we will find our example of living as exiles within the host empire. The 3 dangerous memories he outlines are as follows:
1. God Will Rescue the Exiled People
2. Jesus Was a Radical and a Subversive
3. Jesus Is Our Standard and Example

Rather than becoming comfortable within the host empire, Michael reminds us that as followers of Jesus, a missional lifestyle is an active pursuit that will bring us into proximity with the marginalized, the outcast, and the suffering.

One of the nuggets from this section is the idea of missional proximity.

“God enters fully into close relational and physical proximity to humanity in the pursuit of reconciliation.”

We also need to purposefully live in ways that put us in proximity to those whom God wants to redeem so that our lives intersect closely with the people that Jesus would want us to hang out with.

Michael describes the value of frequenting third places, the places where people go to just relax. He also critiques the way in which churches have become third places for christians, their social network, which actually works to remove them from proximity to people who don’t know Jesus. While he adds that homes are no longer seen as third places, I believe that they still can be. Going against our society’s tendency toward isolation and privacy, we can choose to open our homes more and make them places of hospitality and intimacy.

I found this section a valuable reminder of who we are as Christ-followers and the mission that we are called to actively live.

Exercising Through Exiles

I read the book Exiles by Michael Frost over the last month during my time at the gym. Over the lunch hour, I grab my book and head to the gym.

Aside from the fact that highlighting is difficult on both the elliptical and the treadmill, I love reading while I exercise. If the book is good, it makes the time go fast.

I usually have expectations for a book, hopeful of what I think it might contain. Some books fall short of those expectations and some books far surpass them. I probably had unfairly high expectations for Exiles based on the subtitle “living missionally,” certain there would be answers to my latest questions.

My good friend Alan Hirsch recommended that I read Shaping of Things to Come first, but I was so anxious to crack open Exiles, that I read it first. I also have the same high expectations for The Forgotten Way, so it will be read next. (However, now I’m in the middle of Permission Granted and absolutely loving it!)

Back to Exiles, I don’t plan on giving a formal review, but rather just sharing a few thoughts over the next couple of posts. The outline of the book is based on four disciplines for exiles described by Walter Brueggeman – dangerous memories, dangerous promises, dangerous critique, and dangerous songs.

My impression (personal opinion only, your mileage may vary) is that the heart of Michael’s message is in the first half of the book. It seemed to me that the rest of the book was written to simply fill in the outline. Perhaps I felt that way because the first half of the book was most applicable to my situation.

Today, I’ll just give you a couple of great quotes from the second chapter:

“The degree to which we adopt a tame and insipid picture of Jesus is the degree to which we avoid the mission to which he has called us.”

“We then are free to follow Jesus’ example as he models for us the profound power of sharing a table with the marginalized and the despised. This surely is the locus of missional activity – grace, love, hospitality, generosity.“

Getting Personal Finally

…or in other words, let’s talk about me!

Three years ago, my husband and I were leaders. We had a title and were in the inner circle of power. To be honest, our favorite part of the position was the involvement in peoples’ lives. It was a privilege to be looked to for guidance and to be able to make a difference in someone’s life.

Then suddenly, we weren’t leaders. We turned in our title and badge. Before there were people who turned to us automatically because of our position, now there was no one looking for our help. And I had a leadership identity crisis.

I believe we, as people, are always expressing who we really are. If we weren’t currently serving anyone, then we weren’t leaders. If it is who you are, then it will continue to be true regardless of your circumstances.

Who are you supposed to help when you don’t have a flock already corralled? Why didn’t anyone still want our guidance? Because everyone we knew was at the CLB, and they were off limits to us, someone else’s flock. I missed being involved in peoples’ lives.

We said, “That’s okay, we don’t need to be leaders. We’ll just retreat to the sidelines for awhile.”

Occasionally, people would prod us, saying, “you can’t just deny that you are leaders.”

But what does that mean?

You see, all of this processing about leadership wasn’t as much about what someone else is doing as it was about “who am I?”We have become pretty comfortable on the sidelines. As one of our hippy friends would say, “It’s a safe place maaannn.”

Reading Graham Cooke’s thoughts about leadership as serving/stewardship/slavery challenged me to reconsider the idea of leadership. Would I be willing to take on the responsibilities of leadership? What kind of steward will I be of what God has given me?

At first I was willing to only consider serving to the point that it didn’t involve anything that remotely looked like leadership. In order to move beyond that mental block, I needed a paradigm of leadership that I could trust and models of leadership that made sense.

In the previous posts, I’ve already explained my current paradigm of leadership. Some of the models of leadership that make sense to me are the following:

Leadership as catalyst.
“A catalyst is the kind of person who gets things going and then fades into the background ceding control to members. As there is often no hierarchy and no headquarters the best a person can do to influence people is to lead by example.”
(ht to Jonny Baker)

This is actually the most challenging model to me, but I think it is important. Those who launch something automatically have a vested interest and sense of ownership in it. That is the challenging aspect, directing without controlling, steering without dominating.

Leadership as empowerment.
“Leadership” is not a biblical mandate for New Testament communities. Service, however, is. Those who are in positional authority are there because of their desire to serve – to empower – others. They do not keep power for their own purposes. They give it away – empowering others and enabling them to do the same.

New Testament authority is not “power over”. In fact, that is something that is explicitly forbidden by Christ. Instead, the greatest are to be distinguished by their great service – by their greatness in humility, in empowering others and in their self-giving.
(ht to Scott B)

This is the model that really excites me. To have the opportunity to draw out the capabilities in other people and create a place and opportunity for them to exercise the giftings that God has put in their heart is such an incredible privilege.

Leadership as hubbing.
“The function of leading within a Christ-cluster links other nodes, fosters interpersonal relationship and facilitates connection, and is open to getting out of the way, encouraging the new relationship to develop as those in relationship self-determine.”
(ht to Dwight Friesen)

I love this idea. We can facilitate people in their relationship with the Lord, and we can facilitate relationships among the body of Christ in an interconnected way that is more fluid than the boundaried relationships we have previously seen in churches.

A couple of other links of friends who have recently written incredible posts on the topic of leadership. You don’t want to miss these:

From Alan Knox: Don’t follow the leader, follow the person already serving!

From Jamie Arpin-Ricci: An amazing list of characteristics of leadership that one should have on file but also especially in their heart as a leader.

Anyway, for me, there has been some nudging within lately to step up to the plate. I’m not sure exactly what that will look like, but I know that willingness is what is required of me at this time and a desire to be formed by the One who demonstrated a life of pouring out Himself for others.

Leadership – Part 4

Myth #3: There isn’t leadership in the body of Christ.

Truth: We need a new paradigm of what leadership is in the body of Christ.

The reason I posted the other two myths first is because unless we adopt those truths first, we aren’t situated to develop a new paradigm of leadership. First, leadership must be based on the truth that our status as brothers in the kingdom is that of equals. Second, leadership must evolve organically out of the unique relationships and giftings of a particular group.

Kester Brewin in discussing leadership in such a self-organizing system said this:

“…yes, there is such a thing as leadership in such (self-organizing) systems. But the model and style of leadership is so radically different to that which a) ‘leaders’ are used to using and b) ‘followers’ are used to experiencing that it is enormously tempting to quickly revert to old models of leadership where ‘leaders’ feel in control and the ‘followers’ can abdicate responsibility for their spiritual journey to them and just jump on the bandwagon.”

This change is significant because at the same time that it requires leaders to step down from control, it also requires that the followers step up to take responsibility.

We can’t read about the new testament church without seeing the aspects of leading and following that occur. I think perhaps our mistake has been in assuming that these are set roles for specific individuals. Titles and positions have set us up for a wrong mentality of leadership that is often self-serving rather than focused on serving others.

There is a vast difference in leading from position as opposed to leading from a place of responsibility that requires us to serve, possibly without recognition. Many people want to be seen as leaders, but not nearly as many are willing to serve in obscurity. What degree of service would we still participate in if there were no acknowledgment or recognition of our role?

The new testament gives us instructions on our responsibilities as leaders. In this, we are taught and encouraged to use our wisdom, resources, and gifts in service to our brothers and sisters in Christ. It is so important when we serve a brother by leading, that we understand the boundaries of the relationship and don’t presume authority in their life that isn’t ours.

We are also given instructions on our responsibilities as followers. In this, we are taught to maintain an attitude of respect and submission toward one another. There is wisdom and gifting in even the youngest believer that we can submit ourselves to. Honoring and empowering takes place when we are willing to receive from someone who may have less than us in the realm of privilege, maturity, or experience.

Although we have equal status within the kingdom of God, we recognize that in relationships, sometimes one person has more power. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it requires of that person honest and careful use of their power.

The fact is that some of us are further along on the journey than others. What this means is that we have the privilege and opportunity to share what we can with others. If we are willing to take the time and effort, we can help our brother along the way. This produces relationships that we know as overseeing, pastoring, eldering, and mentoring.

Does this mean that it is our job to manage their life? No, but we might get to be the person that believes in them. We could be the voice speaking God’s truth of their identity and purpose, and we might get to share with them a glimpse of hope in what their future holds. We may also have the privilege and burden of sharing in their suffering.

It is so incredibly sad that in the midst of self-serving, self-promoting leadership within the body of Christ, we have missed the incredible opportunity of fathering in a way that builds worth and identity into a person, especially at a time when there is such a great need for fathering. Instead, due to a need to control, models of discipleship have been the most extreme models of abuse in the church, with the fathers hoarding participation in ministry for themselves.

We can raise up, equip, and release without assuming rulership. When we are willing to lead in a way that serves another without demanding subservience to ourselves, we get the incredible blessing of standing on the sidelines and cheering at the growth and success of those we’ve had the opportunity to give a hand to along the way.

Like a little girl, dancing on her daddy’s shoes, sometimes we get the opportunity to allow someone to dance on our shoes for a bit. It is up to us whether we acknowledge and appreciate the partnership and talent that they bring to the dance. And it is up to us to realize that they will soon be dancing on their own.

Leadership – Part 3

Myth #2: Leaders Shape the Community

Truth: Leadership is shaped by community.

This quote by Leonard Sweet (ht to Len) applies to the myth that the leader holds the vision for the community:

“Leadership as “vision” has become another way about exercising dominance and pushing other people around your ideas…Vision has become a way of declaring dominance, of achieving alpha status and stats.”

Many people seem ready to debunk the myth that a single person is responsible for the vision of a church, and the purpose of the community is to serve that individual’s vision. Others are beginning to explore the idea of leadership that is shaped organically among a community of believers.

In reading Exiles, it would seem that within communitas, the vision evolves based upon the shared values and visions of those who make up the community. I believe it is the synergy of the shared vision that actually inspires and creates an environment to draw forth the leadership giftings in the people involved.

Leadership in a community should evolve from the giftings that are present in the community. With this kind of leadership, different people lead in the areas in which their giftings indicate leadership.

There should be a mutual submission to and recognition of the giftings within one another. If we are truly living the reality of preferring one another, then we will be most attentive to acknowledging the gifts and wisdom of others rather than promoting our own. And yet, in that mutuality, our gifts will be drawn upon also.

This quote by Dwight Friesen describes very well the idea of leadership that is developed in community:

Who is a leader? Leaders are people who tacitly know themselves in relation with others; who live present to those relationships, emptying ’self’ for the fulfillment of the ‘other.’ Leaders do not exist in an ontological sense.

Leadership is summoned by a communal-ethos to serve a socially determined set of functions which the community itself determines and invites a person to fulfill.

The person responding to the specific ethos invitation to serve a momentary leadership function is both shaping and shaped by the vision that the community is calling forth.

This doesn’t fit our existing structures and paradigms very easily. Yet if we first change our concepts of what leadership is, we are better equipped to then address the structural and practical issues.

Leadership – Part 2

Myth #1: Certain individuals are called to be the leaders within the body of Christ.

Truth: We are called to a mission and we are called to serve.

The first myth deals with the false dichotomy of leaders and followers. Lee Hock in his article on chaordic leadership had this to say:

“In the deepest sense, distinction between leaders and followers is meaningless. In every moment of life, we are simultaneously leading and following. There is never a time when our knowledge, judgment and wisdom are not more useful and applicable than that of another. There is never a time when the knowledge, judgment and wisdom of another are not more useful and applicable than ours.

We must examine the concept of leading and following with new eyes. We must examine the concept of superior and subordinate with increasing skepticism. And we must examine the nature of organizations that demand such distinctions with an entirely different consciousness.”

This is especially true in the church. If we are going to break away from the ongoing struggle for position and power we must first acknowledge the equality of our relationships with one another as a basis for understanding leadership amongst ourselves.

None of us has the permanent role of leader in our relationships. If we assume this, we look past recognizing, acknowledging, and following the leadership of others.

What does this mean for vocational ministers? It means that you are called to be an example of living the mission. It means that you are called to serve others in the body. Given your role of positional responsibility (ht to Scott B) you are especially called to acknowledge and empower the leadership of those among you.

This puts the axe to the root of the traditional clergy/laity divide between the leader and the followers. If you understand that you aren’t presumably the permanent designated leader, then there is the ability to establish a relationship of leadership amongst rather than leadership over.

At the very heart it means that we are willing to submit ourselves to those we live among rather than suggesting that our submission is to an external source and that everyone else is supposed to be submitted to us. It means that we recognize that there are giftings and wisdom in those around us that can be of benefit to us also.

If you have been living the role of the elevated leader, how does it feel to consider stepping down to a peer level with those you have led?

I’m not suggesting that the leadership you have be invalidated. What I am suggesting is that your leadership be used to empower those who have assumed the passive role of follower in an entirely new way.

You have the opportunity to validate the leadership of others and model a reciprocal relationship rather than continuing the unhealthy model of over/under relationships.

Frigid Friday!!!

After the last post and comments, I thought this image was appropriate.

Just to be clear, that is NOT ME!

However, I will need a few more thoughtfull showers before my next post on leadership is ready.

In the meantime, have a great Super Bowl weekend,
if that’s your thing.

To those of you enduring this artic blast,
stay warm and stay safe!